Why does authenticity seem so hard to come by?
I’ve been listening to Matthew West’s song “Truth by Told” on repeat lately. It sings to my soul. I love the message and it got me to thinking about my own life.
I was talking with a friend earlier this week about how I’ve craved real, authentic connection for the majority of my life. A kind of connection where I feel safe to be the version of Emily I was created to be and not just the societal approved version of Emily.
It was a pretty deep conversation.
Then it occurred to me… is it other people that I’m craving the authentic connection with or is it an authentic connection to myself that I’m craving.
I think it could be a bit of both.
You see, we have all had our own level of trauma that tells us who we are is not good enough, not worthy, not loveable, not smart. In the process of these messages, it changes the pieces of our personality that we allow to shine through to the outside.
I’ve embarked on a journey that I have deemed, rising from the ashes. It’s a process where I’ve been digging threw all the layers of trauma that I’ve endured in my life and rediscovering and loving the version of me that’s been neglected for so many years.
Acknowledging the truth can be hard because sometimes it’s not what we want to hear. It’s not soft and fluffy. Burying the things that hurt can be a hell of a lot easier than dealing with them but, friend, I’m here to tell you that those emotional wounds are no different than a cut or scrape on your skin. They need air to heal. Speaking the truth is the only way to give them air.
It’s been an amazing process. Not easy but so rewarding. It’s been so refreshing to break down the wall of protection that I had built up around myself and start to love and embrace the beautiful person I was created to be.
I wrote a book on the framework that I’ve created around the process of rising from the ashes. It’s set to officially release next week but you can pre-order the ebook by clicking on the green button below.
Pre-order Rising from the Ashes Here
I was asking a friend to help me narrow down the goals that I set for myself over the next 6 weeks. She had asked me what I was considering so, I listed them off. She helped me talk them through and at the end of our conversation, she made an observation. She said, “ you have a habit of spreading yourself too thin... why do you do that?”
At first, I brushed it off by saying “it’s just how I am” which she didn’t buy. So I tried explaining that I get bored quickly if I don’t have a bunch of different things on the go at the same time.
This is completely true but she wasn’t letting me off the hook. So, I sat there in thought until it came to me.
“I’m addicted to stress?” I questioned
I guess even with all the work I’ve done reclaiming my life, I am still a work in progress... but that will always be true. I will always be a work in progress.
So, you may be wondering, how is someone addicted to stress?!
Well, it’s the chemicals that your brain produces that are actually the addiction but when you’ve lived in a high stress environment for a prolonged period of time, your body begins to become desensitized to the chemicals. If this happens for long enough, you actually become dependent on those chemicals to function.
This is the category, I have realized I am in. I have become dependent on those stress hormones to function. Without them, I feel like my world is going haywire and my anxiety flairs up to create a “calm”… I use that term loosely because it’s not at all calm.
At this point, I don’t have all the answers on how to correct and heal from this addiction but I do know where to start, which is huge. I can also say that if this sounds like you, you aren’t alone and I’d like to invite you on this journey with me.
I have created a community on Facebook of women who are ready to reclaim their lives as their own- body, mind and Pinterest. This is a community all about nourishing our WHOLE selves. It’s a place where we aren’t just mom or the spouse or the caregiver. It’s a community where we are vibrant women creating the lives we have been dreaming of. You’re invited! The more the merrier! The green button below will take you there.
Join the Community
I’ve heard this question time and time again and the answer I usually give is… no, it isn’t.
Today, I’m going to break down why I give this answer. To do this, I’ll share 3 ways that Pinterest is an asset for your business that you NEED to utilize.
Before I do that though, I need to call out the elephant so to speak, I think we can all agree that there is a large DIY audience on Pinterest but the entire platform is not built on DIY… it’s so much more than that!
1. The grow your business you need EYEBALLS
Pinterest has 425 million active monthly users (as I write this in Jan. 2021) and all of those people are not crafters. And even if they were, that is not the only thing they are interested in and searching. People use Pinterest to find answers, being that it is a search engine. So, why Pinterest rather than Google or duckduckgo? Well, I think both can be useful. I like Pinterest because I am a visual learner and Pinterest offers me the visual to grab my attention where Google and duckduckgo do not.
2. It allows you to reach more of YOUR audience.
Let’s talk more on the visual aspect of Pinterest a little more. So, when you create content like a blog, it’s not a 1 and done situation on Pinterest. You can actually share 5 different graphics to every link you share on the platform. When you’re creating 5 different graphics, you’re going to be able to reach a more complete group of your audience because different people are attracted to different graphics. You’re also able to reach more of the visual learners through Pinterest that you would completely miss out on on a less visual platform.
3. It’s EVERGREEN
Yeah, you read that right. Who wants to spend a tonne of time promoting the same thing over and over? As a business owner, you don’t have that kind of time. Therefore, you need to be able to do the work once and have it continue to work for you on its own with little to no action from you. When you use optimize your profile and content, it will show up in searches for years to come.
If you’d like to learn more about how the algorithm of Pinterest works, I’ll be sharing those details in my group, Fierce and Independent Women and it will be saved in the units section for viewing pleasure anytime! There’s also a 5 day Pin Blitz in there that will help you get started with Pinterest if you currently aren’t on the platform. The green button below will take you the group if you’d like in one either of those goods.
This week, I’m taking a bit of a break from talking about Pinterest because I think it’s important for me to be real and authentic in how I show up and this is what’s on my heart this week.
Pressure, but not just any pressure. I’m talking about the pressure to be perfect.
Oh man, I haven’t felt this kind of pressure in such a long time that I kinda forgot what it felt like.
All through school, high school and university, I put this immense pressure on myself to do all the things perfectly.
Perfect papers, perfect projects, perfect grades.
Did I always do things perfectly? Not a chance! Which would begin a cycle of self loathing and negative self talk.
Have you ever found yourself in that cycle or putting those expectations on yourself?
To be completely honest, I have no idea where it stems from for me. That’s a stone I haven’t found yet but this pressure has recently come to the surface with a series of big events happening in my life right now.
It’s not like, I had parents pressuring me with being perfect… they weren’t. I was always told while I was growing up that as long as I did my best, that was all I could do.
I suppose somewhere along the line, my definition of “my best” got a little mixed up.
I have described it to my husband as “feeling like I’m in a pressure cooker.”
This is something that I’m still navigating so I don’t have any sage advice to help you through it. I’m just here to say that if you feel this way… I’m right there with you. I feel it too.
I do know that overcoming this will mean I have to find the root of it and retrain my brain to not put as much pressure on myself to be perfect… which logically, in my head, I know is an unrealistic expectation to have on myself.
If you’d like to follow my journey and walk along side me, I have a community where I help other female entrepreneurs learn how to own their lives— body, mind and business. There’s a pretty awesome training in the units section which teaches you how to utilize Pinterest as a BOSS business tool. Click on the button to head over and check it out!
Join the Community
I went to school. I became a teacher. When I first started out, I had this idealist view in my head that I was going to be a teacher and save the world.
Then, I started teaching and it didn’t take me long to realize that teaching in the traditional classroom wasn’t where I was supposed to be. I loved my co-workers. I enjoyed getting to know and developing relationships with my students but there was something missing.
I knew that I needed to find my purpose and my passion because spending my life doing something that took the fire out of my soul wasn’t an option.
In 2018, just after I had my daughter, I learned about the possibility of creating my own business and it lit a fire in me that teaching had put out.
I started building my business in December 2018. I knew there were many ways that I could build my business and I quickly decided that I would build my business online simply because I have access to way more people online than I do face to face.
I got my website and started learning how to create the content. Then, the real learning started happening.
It’s not enough to create the content, you have to get eyeballs on it…
With this realization, came a big learning curve.
Fast forward to March 2020. By this point, I had learned that I need to use all of my social media platforms to share my business but there was still something missing.
A good Facebook post or Instagram post only has a small reach IF it get interaction. I was looking for something bigger.
I should add that, all the while, I was a big Pinterest fan. I knew that if I could figure out how to use Pinterest with my business that it would be huge for my business.
Then, I figured it out and I started putting my new strategy to work!
I went from crickets on my website to consistent website traffic in a matter of months!
If you’d like to learn how I did it, there’s a training in my free community about how to build your business from nothing on Pinterest. Click the button below to join the party!
Teach me more!